Who Am I Actually?

Hmm, my bloggie seems like full of dust.
Ok, reconstruction done!

I admit I do post emotional things. Actually I'm doubtful on myself. *P.S: I ain't doing stupid things, no worries.

Can I start from family aspect? I got 3 siblings. But years by years, I find out that I'm just different from them. I'm the kind of too open minded, jokers, and yet aggressiveness. They are just stable and steady, mature enough. And, I'm not that close to my parents anymore. Since 12 years ago, we are happy family but not perfect anymore. When my friends facing the same problem, they come to me as they know I had experience that. Should I be happy that I could offer them a help? Or I could say sympathy or empathy? But who really knows I'm facing another family crisis? I don't understand them or vice versa?
I try to earn pocket money, I got the right to choose spend it or keep it. But spend money is the most motivate way for me to earn. Because of desire of this and that. I even think of go for modeling last time as someone did offer me but because safeness, I reject.
Family crisis is very hard to settle. It will take time to prove. May be as my parents think, I will be the factor that make our not perfect even more. I was victim of that. Who do care how I felt. And it makes my eyes get brighter in order to get a good partner of my life.

And friendship? Thanks god I still have it even though is not a lot.
But right now, I just can't wait to finish my degree course faster to get nearer to my future.

Relationship? I got to say 60%. As I described myself, I'm really not confidence enough for that and also I'm his very first love in his life. I wish I could give him better one. No matter what.

LOL, may be I wish I'm a perfect wannabe! But, nothing will be perfect.