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Sunday, March 06, 2011

ytd received a bad news from him...
i felt like fell into a deep hole, without ending...
i knw the fact is always hurt..
but not only me is hurt..he too..
as i'm a student, i don hv good chance to earn money myself..
even wan a part time job, oso need to get everyone permission,
and oso permission of time!
nearly bankrupt..
really felt money is all for me..
need money to do anything..
even date..
i will hv my 5 weeks big holliday soon.
but the bad news broke my plans and my dreams!
i'm really upset and depress..
so i choose to skip class for today,
rather than bring an unhappy face to c everyone...
more tension with tat!!!
love with distance is really hard to continue..
but i was waiting him..till now..i'm still wait..
for the 5 weeks, i knw i dont hv so much money to spend..
i try to do anything tat can save money..
even romantic, i oso do tat..
but everything is spoiled bcoz of tax and law!!!
y huh?!
my 5 weeks, 3 weeks i may be need to spend the time alone!
i knw i hv family, but tat is not enough for me!
i really need someone tat can let me talk about my trouble..
but no anyone can help me, now, he oso cant..
i believe him..but i cant stand with every  time he promised " let him settle for me"
then, wat i stand for??
he cant do everything for me!!!
i oso dont wan to let him choose to solve my problem and make himself in trouble too!!
i just need someone tat can understand my feeling..
everyday we keep waiting and keep expect..
but finally wat we had did might be zero!!!
i'm not a baby anymore,
pls, dont resist my way, ok?!
how close we are oso cant,
tis is my life and pls settle ur stuff first b4 promised or help!
i still love him..
when i heard the bad news,
i really get anger n lots of negative minds..
perhaps, is my temper too bad..
perhaps, is my emotion management not so well..
perhaps, tis is an experience..
perhaps, i shouldnt hope tat wanna be anything i wan...
i'm not trying to give up myself..
but i'm trying to give up to keep expect something tat impossible..

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